The amount a baby cries varies from baby to baby but always remember – your newborn baby is not crying just to annoy you or to be difficult.
For a new parent, and often a very tired one, trying to settle your crying baby can be extremely upsetting and stressful. But most times your baby’s cry is a cry for your help because your baby cannot help itself.
what is ‘normal’?
It is good to know that most babies (especially 4-12 week olds) have an average crying time of 1-2 hours per day, often for no apparent reason.
They also commonly have a particularly bad patch once a day (especially late afternoon or early evening), a bad day about once a week, and a bad week every month or so. This is all quite normal.
The good news is that most babies’ crying does progressively reduce so that an average three-month-old is crying for about an hour each day – although brace yourself because a couple of hours is still not abnormal.
different cries
There are numerous different cries and your crying baby may just be trying to tell you, “I need my nappy changed”, “I’m too hot”, “I’m too cold”, “I’m hungry”, “I’m tired”, “I have wind in my tummy”, “I’m uncomfortable”, “I’m hurting”, “I just need some sucking time”, “I need a cuddle”, … then there’s the cry that soon creeps up unexpectedly on new parents that translates as, “I’m bored!”
There are many different clues that can help you work out the cause of your baby’s crying. Trust your instincts and, with a little hands-on experience, you will surprise yourself at how good you become at picking up some of the different cries.
soothing techniques
- Talking soothingly or singing or humming with your baby’s head against yours. Hearing Mum’s or Dad’s voice can be a great comfort to your baby.
- Gently rock or hold your baby firmly against you offering warmth and security. DO NOT jiggle your baby too vigorously and NEVER shake your baby.
- Taking your baby for a walk in a stroller or sling.
- Putting your baby in the car seat and going for a drive – but not a great habit to get stuck with, so reserve for desperate situations only.
- Burping your baby after feeds.
- Placing your baby across your lap and giving gentle back rubs.
- Placing in a quiet environment away from noise or people.
- Listening to gentle music.
- The sound of the vacuum cleaner.
- Putting down to bed to sleep.
- Lying down beside your baby on a firm mattress (not on a couch as this can lead to suffocation). make sure your baby is away from pillows or loose covers and that the face is well clear. This may also give you time to catch up on some of that missed sleep!
sometimes it's easy
Sometimes it’s easy to pick why your baby is crying. For example, when picked up your baby turns its head to your breast and searches for your nipples. You know that it has been a few hours since the last feed. You’ve just experienced your baby’s cry for, “I’m hungry”. At other times it will be considerably less obvious as to the cause of the crying so the following are some helpful clues.
tired cries
When your baby is crying due to tiredness, then it’s probably not just your average tiredness, but more likely over-tiredness.
signs of a tired baby may include:
- jerky arm and leg movements
- grumpy, grizzly sounds including perhaps a nasal-sounding wail
signs of an over-tired baby may include:
- spaced-out stare often mistaken for alertness
- short wailing cries with short breathes in between that can escalate to long, hard, red-in-the-face crying
hungry cries
If your breastfed baby last started a good feed 2-3 hours ago, or 3-4 hours ago for formula-fed babies, then it is likely your baby could be hungry.
early hungry signs include:
- striking tongue out and lip-smacking
later hungry signs include:
- clearing-the-throat cough-cough sounds
need burping cries
If your baby has a noiseless scream or a high-pitched wailing shrill, while gasping, panting or holding its breath, then probably your baby simply has a bit of wind. A baby needing burping may also curl its tongue upwards, screw its face into a painful smile, tense its body rigid, shake its arms, draw its knees up to the chest and/or frantically suck, then pull off your breast.
unwell cries
Fever symptoms include chills, flushing and sweating which are all part of our body’s normal response for fighting infection. Babies are not able to sweat, therefore fevers are always of great concern.
Newborns should never have fevers. A temperature of 38oC or higher in an under-6-week-old should have urgent medical attention.
A feverish baby can have prolonged whiny low-pitched screams or a weak sounding cry or they can become very quiet. Because fever cries are so inconsistent, the best diagnosis of fever is to check the temperature. A baby’s temperature can rise very quickly, so if ever in doubt take the temperature regularly. A normal temperature is 36.7-37.3oC.
other cries
If your baby is unsettled, fussy, crying a lot, and nothing seems to be working, it is important to find out why – both for your sanity and your baby’s comfort – by contacting your LMC, GP or Plunket Nurse. They will be able to tell you whether or not there is cause for concern, as well as give you some tips on how to manage things.
They can also check for other obvious medical causes such as a groin hernia, a urinary tract infection, colic, reflux, cow’s milk-protein allergy or lactose intolerance.
Seek help and advice early.
